This article was written in 2011 and was published in a few UK-based online magazines. 

The below applies to both genders.

Being a Butler is a state of mind and an attitude. It is an endeavour that is a consistent expression of loyalty, trustworthiness, care and due diligence.

In the United States – The Income of the top 1% accounted for 20% of the national income. Countries like India, China and Canada are recruiting more Butlers than ever.

Here are some qualities of one of the oldest jobs around:

The first thing a Butler must have is an inner sense of well-being.

A Butler’s job is to project calmness and harmony, qualities that have to come from within.

He must be free of hostility, ill will, anxiety, prejudice or ego.

While his employer will sometimes make a decision they don’t agree with, he must be able to accept this and move on. All his conduct should be directed to one end: the well-being of the family he works for.

He is prepared that sometimes his best intentions may be misunderstood – in which case he is mature enough not to get upset.

Eventually, almost every employer will learn the true intentions of their Butler. Then life will become easier. Until then, you must be patient.

A Butler who is impatient or fretful cannot be mindful or wise.

Being able to maintain a sense of well-being despite the pressure and tension around him is one of the Butler’s core skills and one of the reasons why Butlers are handsomely paid.

Externally, a Butler’s well-being is reflected in his appearance, grooming and the way he/she treats those who work for him/her or with him/her. He must have excellent listening skills – skills that will comfort employers and staff alike, and nourish relationships.

There will be times when Butlers are overwhelmed with work; this is when the values can get lost if they end up becoming a part of the regular staff. Butlers must understand that they hold the keys or precepts that ensure the efficient running of the household, which includes the staff who work under them, only they know how they use and apply them. Like the captain of a ship, they should stay on the bridge rather than work below decks. 

Most families and individuals who employ such Butlers understand these things and allow room for manoeuvre. But this won’t happen automatically, which is why a Butler must be proactive, look ahead, and stay on top of every situation.

Even the most seasoned Butler must be prepared not to be taken by surprise.

Unexpected events do happen. Most employers understand this and are considerate, but employers too can be taken aback, and may sometimes react unreasonably. These are the times when good Butlers prove their worth by keeping cool heads, dealing with events as best they can, and always maintaining a sense of ease. When emotion subsides, continuity and harmony are restored.

Good Butlers enjoy their skills as much as their employers do, if not better.

The same applies to Housekeepers, House Managers, Domestic and Household Staff and in the current day Personal Assistants too.